Sunday, November 16, 2014

Articles Don't Define My Parenting

It's like one day I just decided to stop blogging, only it wasn't really intentional. One day led to another day, another day led to another and another and another. & before I knew it I hadn't blogged in weeks, months. I just can't seem to find the time to do it all like other mommy bloggers! But today, I'm finding time & I figured, one good post every so often means just as much as several mediocre posts. 

So this: 


This is where my time goes. This is where my heart lies. 


My time goes to pirates and princesses. To cooking breakfast and changing diapers. To folding laundry and attempting to get it put away within 1-2 weeks time. To teaching words, manners, numbers, and colors. To loving, living, and showing. 


& this, this is why I don't blog. But today, I want to write. 

I want to write and tell you that so many times people tell me, "oh you've got your hands full. Oh you're such a great mother. Oh how do you do it all?" 

& really, those comments are flattering and encouraging and wonderful. But deep down when you ask how I do it all, I really really want to reply with this:  

"I do every parenting no-no that you constantly post articles about." 

& I know, that's terrible. It is. But hey, that's me. & that's the truth. Articles don't define my parenting. Situations define my parenting. 

I parent differently by situational circumstances. 

I'm just as guilty as posting articles about parenting as the next mom. But the articles aren't really what gets to me. It's the comments you write when you post it. It's the arrogance of your comments back to the mom decided to post in disagreement of your words/the article. & sure, I mean we're all "to each their own" as we comment on controversial subjects and then loudly groan and immediately bad talk that mom to your husband. Oh, you don't do that? Ya, me neither. I never talk to my husband about disagreeing with parenting approaches.  Ever. 

Moving on.

If you can't talk and vent to your husband than who can you talk to? That's the difference. Certain things are better left unsaid. & certain things are better left for face to face conversations because words written can be misconstrued. But, it's fine to disagree with someone. It's fine to be pro spanking, against spanking, pro homeschool, pro public, etc etc etc etc --basically post any controversial subject here. ITS FINE. But, please be mindful of your tone and position. Please be open to hearing someone's reasoning, perspective, and thoughts on the subject. 

There currently is not, has never, and will never be a perfect way to parent every single child. 

So, the disproven theories on the subject that I strongly agree with mean about the same to me as me explaining the disproven theory I used that worked for my family like a charm to you. & Oh, I'm telling you to hide the veggie in your meal - & you're like listen, all my kid will eat is fish sticks. Move along. 

& basically, I'm just saying - articles and friends and our own moms can tell us 5 million things on how/what to do...But, those 5 million things may not pertain to your baby. 

I'm not against articles and advice. In any way. In fact, I LOVE reading articles and learning parenting styles/approaches. I'm just saying, I am not defined by a theory. I fit no parenting technique/label. I fit many. I do what's best in each situation, sometimes that means spanking and other times that means redirection. Sometimes that means time outs and sometimes that means one on one attention time. 

The only thing that defines my parenting are the smiles I get from my kids. The hugs, the laughs, the memories. My kids define my parenting. It's all for them anyways.  

XOXOX, 
Harmon Housewife 



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